Monday, April 20, 2015

My mulberry days...

Sometimes... it seems like I'm feeling my way into *old age*... slowly, cautiously, but with optimistic trepidation? 

This particular blog I've decided to concentrate wholly on things pertaining to old age and retirement - my old age and retirement.  I decided to call it "my mulberry days" - a peaceful serene bittersweet time of life - similar to the old BBC Series that you can still find on PBS.

I also thought of calling it, "my days of wine and roses" - but decided that wasn't really appropriate since I can't drink wine due to my migraines and although I like roses (especially the very light pink old world ones), roses aren't my favorite flower (daisies and sunflowers are). 

Anyway, this morning I'm thinking how sad it is that DH and we don't live closer to water. I grew up with the Mississippi River and Lake Pontchartrain on our doorstep and really found this closeness comforting. Sometimes I think that I'd love to live on a cliff overlooking the ocean... or near a beach where I could walk by the water and pick up shells and treasures. I remember the little coves that we walked on in Dingle, Ireland (still have the rocks picked up there). And the roaring ocean and caves that we saw when visiting Tintagel Castle in Cornwall. Even the secluded beach we visited in Maine felt like home to me. But alas, it is not to be. Texas is our home now and I doubt that we will ever move again. 

And don't get me wrong, I do like Texas... a lot... but there's something about the peace that comes living by the water (unless there's a storm - but even that has a majesty about it.)

On another subject entirely - do you dream? I dream a lot - always have. But lately my dreams are less serene and more confrontational?  And I don't know why. Maybe because my actual life in not confrontational, that my dreams are - possibly to find some sort of balance? None of them ever relate (to my knowledge) to anything actually going on - except possibly TV episodes that almost all involve conflict (Sensible solution: stop watching TV at night?). Does age make one more susceptible to emotion? 

I think age tends to make us more sentimental... family and friends more dear. There's a poem about this...

The days grow shorter, the nights grow longer;
The headstones thicken along the way;
And life grows sadder, but love grows stronger
For those who walk with us day by day.

The tear comes quicker, the laugh comes slower;
The courage is lesser to do and dare;
And the tide of joy in the heart falls lower, 
And seldom covers the reefs of care.

But all true things in the world are truer,
And the better things of earth seem best, 
And friends are dearer, as friends are fewer, 
And love is all as our sun dips west.

Then let us clasp hands as we walk together,
And let us speak softly in low sweet tone,
For no man knows on the morrow whether
we two pass on - or but one alone.

- Ella Wheeler Wilcox


  1. I recall visiting an acquaintance of my parents' who lived high on a bluff overlooking the Mississippi River. I think it was in Louisiana. They were a bit eccentric--at least he was. he built the house and it had an elevator, no stairs. The elevator was simple a floor that rose to the second floor; no enclosure. Interesting. I was nine or ten when we went.

  2. My cousin in N.O. has a small home that she rebuilt after Katrina destroyed her old one. It had to be built up 10 ft and she has stairs outside both in the front and back of the house, but an elevator on the front porch. It's really very handy... she's in her 70's.

  3. Yes, I do dream a lot, vivid and memorable often, and mundane now and then. Congratulations on your new blog! :-)

    1. I really like dreaming, DJan. Sometimes my dreams help me understand things, but lately they're almost all a bit confrontational. I wish I knew why. Perhaps I'll skip TV in the evenings for a while and see if that helps.

  4. What a lovely post and a lovely idea, Rian. I think it will be useful to step away the "smushed' concerns of day to day life and reflect a bit like this once in a while.

    1. I think so, Olga. At this time in our lives, it seems like we should be paying attention and not just going with the flow...

  5. We retired on the Oregon coast, a small fishing village with spectacular views. I had always wanted to be close enough to walk to the beach, to sit and stare at it...I get to do all of that. and more.
    I'll probably die here too; though, moving closer to doctors when we can no longer drive might be a good thing. In the meantime, I'm enjoying my dream place.

    1. Your retirement place sounds wonderful. I would like that. However, DH is a city boy and leaving a place where he's comfortable (doctors, included) is not something he would consider seriously. But I can enjoy your fishing village vicariously through your blog...

  6. oh I would love to live near the ocean or water and then again I moved here because I missed the mountains, old age isn't for sissies that's for sure, medical bills and aches and pains and financial worries all take their toll and make me dream of all that might befall me. ugh.

    1. I think that's why we need to take each day as a gift... and on those days that we find it hard to appreciate the gift... then, just remember that if we're lucky, tomorrow will be another day.

  7. I like your idea for a new blog, Rian, and it's now in my Feedly reader. We've never lived really near water until we started to come to the far north of Scotland twice a year. Here we can see the tide rise and fall twice a day in the kyle (estuary) just below the house we stay in and I love that.
    I do dream, but don't often remember much about my dreams in the morning - probably a good thing. :-)

  8. Perpetua, DH and I stayed in a little coastal town in Scotland - east coast I think - called Berwick on Tweed - Quiet little place. People very nice. And later went to North Scotland (Thurso) - which was windy and cold even in May. But the prettiest sunset I've ever seen was in Cornwall at Land's End.

    1. We pass through Berwick on Tweed if we go north on the east coast route to Scotland. It's right on the border with England and changed hands several times in the medieval wars between England and Scotland. Thurso is right on the north coast in the flat landscape of Caithness to the east of us here and it's virtually always windy there. :-) We were there last week and it was beautifully sunn , but only warm out of the wind.


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